being with joy

new name... new blog

2011-06-14T08:10:00.000-07:00

will be periodically sharing at this address from now on...

www.abibechard.wordpress.com

magic...

2011-02-26T08:33:00.000-08:00

airplanes in a sky of hot air balloons

2011

2011-01-06T11:41:00.000-08:00

All wrongs forgotten & all vengeance made right.

Suffering verbs put to sleep inthe night.

Future descending like a bright chandelier

Ritter

exactly a week away from our two month anniversary.

it's strange to think that it's been that long.

it's strange to think that it's been that short.

never were a couple so immersed in blessing.

our people gave so much in joy, words and material.

now i'm a wife.

i wake up early and crack open eyes and eggs.

laugh and cry and apologize and forgive.

it's a marriage.

this coming year is one of terrifying hope.

i will do some of the most foolish acts,

i will be acquitted in grace of them.

great responsibilities laced in enormous privileges.

the truth is 2010 was the happiest of my life.

most of that grade dependent on the last month of the year.

onward

brink of giving all i am

2010-11-10T16:33:00.000-08:00

I will greatly rejoice in the LORD,

my soul shall be joyful in my God;

for He has clothed me with the garments of salvation,

He has covered me with the robe of righteousness,

as a bridegroom decks himself with ornaments,

and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.

I get to speak these words this weekend...
in three short days

I will be a bride

to a man who has given a heart of sacrifice
an arm of diligence
a mouth of kindness

I rejoice
I joy
I murmur thanksgiving under every breath

monday is better with babies

2010-08-09T18:40:00.000-07:00

thoughts on a home day

2010-07-23T13:51:00.001-07:00

apparently i've been out of the house too much...
one morning at home is all kinds of weird.

some editoral notes on my family

:one:
amazing how loving people become when one of the crew is leaving. Mercy is off to Summer Sanctus and there was much hugging. when Papa does his ballerina skip thingy toward you it's a clear indication of suppressed melancholy. i miss her just because she isn't easily accessible.

:two:
Papa was teaching Caleb (a friend's 2yold boy we routinely watch) to sing "Wanted Dead or Alive" by Bon Jovi... really now?

:three:
do you attain territoral insticts when engaged? like onto nesting for maternity? it's no secret that my wardrobe is somehow a sister free-for-all... but at least have the decency of pretending you aren't stealing my clothes. what i don't see is much easier to be chill about. *glare* iloveyouvangieandmercyokay.

:four:
Dodie watches The Great Escape. this explains a lot.

......

in other news;
date tonight with my Goodman.
kinda thrilled beyond measure.
this is a rare situation people.
i did infact google "cute first date outfits"

*laugh*

a few engagement portraits

2010-06-02T09:26:00.000-07:00

of leaves and kings

2010-04-27T19:47:00.000-07:00

"I've got you, babe, to wear my ring"

2010-04-20T06:06:00.000-07:00

Here is the simple story

He proposed in a tux after dancing in the rain.

I said 'yes' like my life depended on it;

and it does.

We are savouring the realization that we are betrothed.

*pause*

With two weekends of community joy planned ahead...

(a psalm sing and friends wedding)

...we are postponing any wedding talk till mid to late May.

This will enable us to peacefully revel in the joy that is ours.

Suffice to say that that "delay of planning" will not put us into a time crunch.

This is a miracle:

That a man so good and blessed

would hold

a girl so raw and blessed.

We have the honour of glorifying God and and enjoying Him...

forever

together

gold

2010-04-19T06:44:00.000-07:00

Jedediah Bechard asked for a wife...

Abigail Vrazo said yes

forever
&
ever

green

2010-04-11T20:27:00.000-07:00

it's beautiful
even in all it's pollen
and mind fogging powers

things are growing all around
within as well

my inadequacies are only superseded by His grace

april

2010-04-06T20:09:00.000-07:00

... can't wrap my head around that one ...
.... around the whole year ....

simple

2010-03-21T18:38:00.000-07:00

I dreamed you first, but not so real
And every day since I found you, such moments we steal
Like little thieves, we rub our hands
And hold our hearts between them
But will you hear me and know?

I want only this
I want to live
I want to live a simple life
-Weepies

my man is gone and it's too early to sleep and too late to edit...
so here we are.

*smile*

all is well.
we wake and work and wait and worship and wonder
it's a pleasant revolution

summer is peeking around the corner...

2010-02-17T21:35:00.000-08:00

and yellow is the colour that comes to mind

adventuring minds...

2010-02-10T22:13:00.000-08:00

...they wander
without bodies

darn this cold

ready to walk my streets and grasses again

after nap

2010-02-09T19:10:00.000-08:00

with the bluntness morning affords...

2010-02-06T07:11:00.000-08:00

it's an empty saturday morning
without coffee
and other movement stimulators

so thought i'd blog
_

this is old news,
but somewhat unproclaimed
_

i'm a courted little girl

here are faces

he is my goodman

we celebrated six months recently
amid wonder and joy and hope

sometimes i realize that my prayers are being answered
sometimes i forget that such lavish blessing were petitioned for
sometimes i cringe at the boldness of my reaching hand

sometimes i'm speechless

sometimes we are speechless

sometimes we waltz
sometimes we laugh
sometimes we fall
sometimes we sing

i am overthrown

introducing MissA

2010-01-26T16:25:00.000-08:00

took my 1.8f lens into 'work' today to catch a few shots of the bebe...
somehow the camera jumbled the card...
but this one came out-

straight out of the bath with a pirate soul

♥

2010 is for fulfilling

2010-01-22T12:29:00.000-08:00

* GOAL *

"sail paper boats down a stream"

* CHECK *

Peace Out 2009

2010-01-22T12:23:00.001-08:00

moment

2009-11-19T20:29:00.000-08:00

exhale

2009-11-14T20:47:00.000-08:00

...

some of the last month and a half is here
in between the pixels and saturation
it's been a gilded time

kisses

2009-11-14T20:42:00.000-08:00

last week we went to Botanical Gardens for a picnic
MissO brought "nigh' nigh' bear"
*mmmwaaa*

this november night

2009-11-14T20:31:00.000-08:00

i photographed dodie
who asked me to model
"look thataway!"

Favourite iPolaroids of October

2009-11-14T19:14:00.000-08:00

hullo October

yes
i do have the bestest of jobs
yes
i do like to document it extensively

i love me some tiny tiled floors

cut my hair

went across the country to visit this lovely

in the beautiful city of Seattle

♥

tights of thunder to pummel the streets into submission

we made music in coffee pubs

and ate the lunch of goddesses

here are the goddesses themselves...
of laughter and mirth
and sore stomach muscles

there was an Anthropologie
Mercy's first visit...
awe

*laughter*

shop ceilings

rebellion was rampant

there were some sentimental hearts involved

Kate and i embarked on a sail

we were happy

then goodbyes with sleepy eyes

and coffee breath

home to sweet snuggles

impromptu sink baths

Fort Worth has her moments

the sun turned golden

my hair grew long

swung

slept

woke

*

*

she puts up with me

babysat Colebear
who has grown in leaps and bounds

people were walked with

snuggles were had

such was October

pink messy girl

2009-10-20T21:07:00.000-07:00

all the tangles and dust of childhood intertwined with giggles

OCTOBER

2009-10-02T06:30:00.000-07:00

bring on the unfounded joy

little joys

2009-09-17T17:21:00.003-07:00

i have a new little person in my life
her name is MissO
we like watching raindrops

i missed being a nanny too much

wondersome

2009-08-28T15:45:00.000-07:00

life
now
is such

My Life According to The Innocence Mission

2009-08-14T22:31:00.001-07:00

Are you male or female?
The Girl On My Left

Describe yourself:
Beautiful Change

How do you feel?
Keeping Awake

Describe where you currently live:
What A Wonderful World

If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Into Brooklyn, Early In the Morning

Your favorite form of transportation:
Small Planes

Your best friend is:
Brave

Your favorite color is:
Bright As Yellow

What is the weather like?
No Storms Come

Favorite time of day:
Now The Day Is Over

If your life was a T.V. show, what would it be called?
You Chase The Light

What is life to you?
A Wave Is Rolling

Your relationships:
Too Early To Say

Your fear:
Oh Do Not Fly Away

What is the best advice you have to give:
Speak Our Minds

If you could change your name, you would change it to:
Medjugorje

Thought for the day:
Some Clear Joy Is Coming

How I would like to die:
Happy, The End

My soul's present condition:
Everything's Different Now

My Motto:
One For Sorrow, Two For Joy

and then it was...

2009-08-05T22:04:00.000-07:00

yes

2009-07-23T12:00:00.001-07:00

facts:

2009-07-20T19:24:00.000-07:00

this is kate
she is my best friend
she is on her way up north
north is very far away

i love her

arrow -->

2009-07-14T15:04:00.000-07:00

lookie here

because it's sat and i'm home

2009-07-11T20:07:00.001-07:00

Can you do this without deleting any questions?
of course

What comes to mind when I say 69?
creakily rocking on porch swing... in one of those mexican dresses.

Is there a person that you can go to in sweats, hair a mess, and still feel comfy?
yes. i don't deal to much with caring how others see me.

Have you ever thought about killing someone in detail?
no. i've actually tried.
but i got all confused around the "get rid of the body part",
by that time i'd forgotten why i wanted to murder this person.

What do you have pierced on you?
ears. once.

Who was the last person you cried in front of?
http://static.twirlit.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/away-we-go-1.jpg

Who knows your secrets?
i don't have secrets. seriously.

Do you straighten your hair?
no. bah!

Has a good friendship ended recently that you wish had not?
*crinkles nose in order to evaluate better*
there are people who melted away because of life that i would have enjoyed knowing better...
but not really anything definite.

How old will you be in 4 years?
twenty-seven

Would you kiss anyone on your top friends?
this doesn't apply to me since i don't do the "top friends" thing

Was today a good day?
today was long and seemed like a succession of days.
but they all had their good moments and i am content and thankful.

Will tomorrow be?
tomorrow is the reason i know what "good" means.

Do you have a ceiling fan in your room, and if so, is there dust on that fan?
yes and yes

Are you happy right now?
*smile*

Have your brothers or sisters ever told you that you were adopted?
no. i'm the oldest that's my right alone.

Do you like being home alone?
from my four experiences:
yes! it's like watching yourself in a dream.
all silent and still.

Connection between you and the last person who text messaged you?
friendship and *theglare*

Is there anyone you trust who you shouldn't?
if i knew that i wouldn't trust them.
duh.
but probably.
i tend to put trust in those who enable my weaknesses...
this, time has shown, is a plan reft
(the opposite of 'bereft')
with fail.

Will you be in a relationship in the next month?
i would hope to have not escaped from those i'm in

Do you have anything that belongs to a partner or an ex partner?
define partner.
we are human and we leak onto others.

When was the last time you cried really hard?
a few weeks ago.
seeing your sin is hard.

Do you argue with people often?
NO!
YES!

What would you say if a girl told you they were in love with your brother?
*laugh*
loudly

Where is your number one person on your friends list?
doesn't apply

Have you ever had a school picture turn out absolutely dreadful?
no school photos...
oh actually when we "started school" we did take one photo.
i love that photo.
my little clasped hands...
eager for math and reading.
*pity*

Does it bother you when you text somebody and they take forever to respond?
no.
i think of texts like pigeon carriers.
sometimes the pigeons get lost.
sometimes they see a juicy hotdog morsel.

Who did you spend at least two hours with today?
sommer, mercy, vangie, mom, papa.

Would you ever date your number one on myspace?
not applicable

Have you ever fallen asleep texting someone?
ish.

Do you act differently around the person you like?
again.
if you knew this why would you act differently?
and again, not applicable.

Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?
never dated.

Who's shoulder did you last cry on?
Papa...
also happens to be the only shoulder i've cried on.

Where did your last hug take place??
kneeling in the kitchen.
dodie.

Have a best friend?
yes.
surprisingly.
i always use that term with a novel shock.

Are you tall?
no.
very average.
5'7

Ever received a really long apology?
yes.

Do you want kids?
is the pope catholic?

How are you?
healthy, blessed and thankful.

Guilty about something?
no.
but only because i'm particularly adept at being oblivious to my guilt.

Ever done something illegal?
sure and have the driving tickets to prove it.

Do you have any friends whose parents won't let them hang out with you?
no.

Have you had strong feelings for someone this year?
i have strong feelings toward everyone i care for.
and i care for a lot of people.

Have you ever fallen asleep while talking to someone?
yes.

Have you ever worn the opposite sex's clothing?
yes.
boy hoodies always work better.

Think of the last person who said I love you to you, do you think they meant it?
papa...
well i darn well hope so.

Who was the first person you talked to today?
vangie.
since she sleeps in the same bed.

What can't you wait for?
i can and do wait for everything.
now the question
"what do you WISH you didn't have to wait for"
would be answered differently.

What woke you up this morning?
a *ping* from my phone.

Who was the last person you fell asleep on or rested on?
mercy.
in the car.

Who was the last person to call you?
papa.
warning he was coming from the pool with cold, wet, hungry children.

Do you drink more water or juice?
water

Are you there for your friends?
that would be a goal

How different are you from three years ago?
*thinks back that far*
2006... i was 20...
oh...
that year.
wow.

Do you hate being alone?
no.
i hate being lonesome.

What's your favorite color?
white.
yes.

Do you get along with girls?
much better now than i did when we were more girls than women.
it's been an evolving thing:
mostly dependent on me being less of a snob.

What are you doing right now?
listening to YouTube music videos.
wiggling my toes to the music.
sweating.
enjoying the clacking/clicking of the keyboard.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPMIXk-ipT0

Do you think you're old?
no.
having older friends is the surest way to feel your youth.
because they are a few years ahead and still so young.

Are you afraid of the dark?
only when i'm afraid of something else.
but usually i love my inky air.

Do you like your life?
i would be an idiot not to...
and there are idiotic moments.
but i'm quite sane now.

Ever talked to someone that was drunk?
yes.
it's not pleasant.

Do you have good vision?
you mean physically or for the future?
yes and no.

Have you ever lost a friend?
yes.
both to death and life.

Did you have a dream last night?
i always dream.
last nights i can't recall now.
but i remember waking up amused.

What should you need to be doing?
that sentance was horribly structured.
nothing needed...
probably some shoulds though.

Can you handle the truth?
yes.
i do much better with truth
than the time where God is preparing a path
for the truth to make its way down.

What time did you wake up this morning?
8:10am

How often do you talk on the phone?
it depends.
a lot when my best friend has the indecency to leave the state.

Are you currently frustrated with someone?
only surface like.
it's hard to be truly frustrated when i can ALWAYS "see your side of the coin".
*sigh*

Have you made a prank phone call?
no

Do you use chapstick?
yes.
i wear lipstick close to never.

Do you like your hair?
i happen to think my hair is my crowning glory.
and yes i know how conceited that sounds.

Have you ever broken your arm?
no.
does carpel tunnel in both wrists count for something?

Full House or Brady Bunch?
Brady Bunch makes my eyes go wide with laughter.

Do you have any scars?
small ones.

Do you have a friend that starts with the letter Q?
no.
unfortunatly.
this makes me want to name my child
"Quentin" or "Quetzalxochitl"
(yes that is a real name)

What month and year is it?
july 2oo9

Do you love someone?
fervently.
most of them live mere footsteps from my bed.
that's something to be full of joy about.

♥

2009-07-10T18:16:00.000-07:00

had lunch with Colebear
he's grown so big and smart!
♥

full moon . july

2009-07-08T22:12:00.000-07:00

july...

2009-07-01T22:10:00.000-07:00

not sure what to think about that
so think i shan't

.

2009-06-09T08:03:00.001-07:00

momentary song obsession

(the photo is just one from the bottom drawer of edits)

as i work...

2009-06-08T19:58:00.000-07:00

one of last fall's clients are buying prints
going through the photos i rediscover this face

she's so young
so easy
so brinking

that seemingly forever time of being girl
girl through to your pith

this woman remembers that time with fondness

on being

2009-06-05T12:35:00.000-07:00

"it blew me away"

how many times have i heard or said that?

read this quote in a book...
and it had never stopped me before.
then i realized...
when we are amazed,
awed,
surprised,
in a way, we have ourselves (Me) blasted aside.

it's an apt saying.
when moments of great beauty, joy or even shock are made known;
then the mask of Me is momentarily absorbed by that moment,
Me ceases.

i'd always taken this expression as...
"blown like a tumbleweed by a force of greatness."
and in my head the camera pans to follow Me pushed aside so roughly.

but in truth,
the focus is on the moment.
Me ripped aside,
like a frail, clouded tissue on the lens.

it's the same for:
"I lost myself in the moment"
or
"forgot myself"
If thou could empty all thyself of self, Like to a shell disinhabited
T.E.Brown

i am delighted when words gain depth.

*smile*

The White Darkness

2009-05-30T20:07:00.000-07:00

Some say the world will end in fire,

Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To know that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
Robert Frost

it glowed behind the librarian
she paused during checkout to retrieve it

i am one of those people
i'll buy a film, book, album based on a cover
*shrug*
that blazing white
alluring gold seal
it's the perfect size
the perfect font spacing
it's a pleasure to be seen with

often as not this approach is misleading
but sometimes...
not

i loved this book

it has some modern crass moments
but most of it is sharp and vivid
the author is wellread; a wordsmith
she's not apologizing for anything
her characters are real
you hear unwritten words

can't go wrong with an opening quote such as this

"there's a sweet bird calling..."

2009-05-27T06:17:00.000-07:00

High on a hill,
And way up yonder,
All come together,
Are you in or are you out,
The eleventh day was hell,
But the heart grows stronger,
All come together,
And be in no doubt.

song of now:
♫ high on a hill: Kate Rusby ♫
with Chris Thile

golden

2009-05-23T13:11:00.000-07:00

(click on iphone collage to enlarge)

the day i turned 23
we went to the park
caught tadpoles
waded upstream
got sunburned
swung

it was epic

last weekend

2009-05-22T06:55:00.000-07:00

went down south to visit my favouritist almost-family

wore this at the Urban Outfitters
(which i was overly ecstatic about)

sun night we reverently did this

i held this bit of adorableness

drove home with the windows down
while listening to children's book on tape

hurrah for blessings tangible

just now...

2009-05-14T21:35:00.000-07:00

cured the urge to own feathers
brought on by
this childhood movie

(this is my official turning-23-next-week portrait)
.sarcasm intended.

song to hear
I was born to laugh
I learned to laugh through my tears
I was born to love
I'm gonna learn to love without fear
~Over the Rhine

film to watch

if cinematography moves you to tears
as it does me 

book to read 
drowning in the sequel
dreading the night-lighted last pages

it's a girl...

2009-05-10T16:46:00.000-07:00

emily took me to the opera this weekend
my text read:

"I'm wearing the most amazingly horrific outfit tonight.
I'm so excited. Thanks for being my date!"

looks rather tame in the photo...
but it's a mass of lace and a heck of a bow

dress: vintage Victor Costa

Hullo Day....

2009-05-07T05:43:00.000-07:00

...

2009-05-06T20:55:00.000-07:00

i think i'd like to feel an elephant heartbeat
some day

unavoidable...

2009-05-05T00:13:00.000-07:00

Steadfast love, like gravity,
keeps stars in place.
Enduring love's hilarity
burns bright with grace.
L'Engle

hilarity

: boisterous merriment or laughter

boisterous

Main Entry: bois·ter·ous
Function: adjective: Etymology: Middle English boistous crude, clumsy
Date: 14th century

:durable, strong, massive
:noisily turbulent, rowdy
:marked by exuberance and high spirits
:stormy, tumultuous

...
oh.
as in...
"He's not a tame lion"

seems as if i should be grasping this by now.

neither Papa or i can sleep.
i made matching cups of tea.
there's a bird outside who's song is marked by exuberance.
he seems not deterred by the dark or questions.
he seems expectant and free of care.
all few ounces of his lungs.
i'm rather sure i have more lung to wield in worship.

drip

2009-05-03T17:16:00.000-07:00

if water can bore through stone with enough time;
surely truth can erode fear within

If and that we grow apart
Earth's orbit shakes.
With the rending of one heart
All heaven breaks.

Steadfast love, like gravity,
keeps stars in place.
Enduring love's hilarity
burns bright with grace.

If and that our love is pain,
so does love grow,
that Love's bewildering reign
earth's hearts may know.

Madeleine L'Engle

see and hear

2009-05-02T18:49:00.000-07:00

♫ humming ♪

shrugs

2009-04-30T12:22:00.000-07:00

Look For Me As You Go By

2009-04-29T20:50:00.000-07:00

Hullo Abi,

Remember you are blessed.
Like that time your family all tumbled together to be together.
Or that hug; the kind that held till you relaxed and melted a bit.
Remember that you are loved and forgiven.
That you could never fear enough,
doubt enough,
be confused enough
to break the hold of that blessing.

your pride has no sway on the weight of glory.

This dark you are so keenly aware of...
it's unlite hope,
the strained pause before a clash of splendor.

Be patient,
be courageous,
be grateful.

There is no other response for the depth of love you breath within.

Hang my head low, so low.
Don't see me only as I am
but see me how I long to be.
Shining like a flowering tree
under a gray Pennsylvania sky.
Look for me as you go by.
Hang my head low, so low.
Every burden shall be lifted.
Every stone upon your back slide into the sea.
It's me for you and you for me.
-the innocence mission

♫ listen

"plane in the sunset..."

2009-04-24T22:29:00.000-07:00

song of the night... or month...

"you know sister..."

2009-04-22T20:10:00.000-07:00

the music to these images

iphone polaroids

2009-04-15T21:22:00.000-07:00

i am grateful for my sisters
i truly am

blink

2009-04-11T15:00:00.000-07:00

just tried to say,
"you're welcome"
and
"no problem"
at the same time

"no, you're problem"

o gosh
what a way to end a phone call

Glory: Abi, how old are you?
Abi: Twenty-two
Dodie, with excitement: Hey! I already did two!

momentary things of happiness

2009-04-08T20:41:00.000-07:00

darling, come what may...

2009-04-06T20:34:00.001-07:00

...it's april after all

circular staircase...

2009-04-06T17:09:00.000-07:00

this weekend....

2009-04-03T21:14:00.000-07:00

Martin and Vrazo from abigail vrazo on Vimeo.
gonna hang with this group
there will be marshmallows

"it would be a lie to run away"

2009-04-02T21:49:00.000-07:00

hullo,

waiting for my online print order to go through,
so
i can restart the computer,
so
photoshop may be revived,
so
photos can be resized,
so
they might be loaded onto the website,
so
a 'online proofing announcement' can be emailed,
so
sleep may come to this weary body and mind.

in the meantime listening to music
trying to be ever praise giving
even from emptiness

i don't like these halting moments
it's easier to keep running from useless task to useless task

hard is good

right?

heaven knows

"if you're patient i will surprise..."

2009-04-01T21:33:00.000-07:00

For You, O God, have tested us;
You have refined us as silver is refined.
You brought us into the net;
You laid affliction on our backs.
You have caused men to ride over our heads;
We went through fire and through water;
But You brought us out to rich fulfillment.
Psalm 66

just words

2009-03-28T21:19:00.000-07:00

falling . kate rusby

considering moments...

2009-03-27T13:47:00.001-07:00

this was a good one

there was a whale of cloud

2009-03-25T21:42:00.000-07:00

(click to enlarge)

where my brain resides this hour

2009-03-23T12:44:00.001-07:00

proof that amazing comes in red-headed packages and coveralls

You are Marianne Dashwood

Most girls can relate with Marianne on a more personal level than some of Austen's other characters. She represents the emotional longings and struggles that seem to attack and bless us at the same time. Loyal to a fault, passionate for experience and life, and a bit over-emotional, Marianne matures and grows (making her so beloved).

(at 84%)

this came as no surprise
waiting for my Colonel Brandon
who will love me despite all that

i want to live till fall

2009-03-22T21:23:00.000-07:00

so i can go see this

by myself

she's shiny

2009-03-20T20:22:00.000-07:00

here are her words

current listen:
Garden State soundtrack

it continues...

2009-03-20T13:10:00.000-07:00

mercy and i went out for a mini session
get used to the borrowed camera
check out a location

the light was a demon
(all my sunsets are taken up this week)

yet, we got a couple

just

2009-03-19T21:13:00.000-07:00

last night i dreamt there was evil penetrating my home

woke to stare into the window lit wall
listen to the city rumble out its 3am song

dearth of calm in the pith of this swell

i crafted that phrase waiting for sleep to come again and mask the fear

***

thankful for daily touchstones,
icons of God's continual movement
such as the dusk
it's ruddy cycle
never waivering

while i quake

London fika

2009-03-18T21:38:00.000-07:00

here we are:
the golden trio
on a cold day
in london
with tea

and across the street...

this may very well be the moment i fell in love

(kate took photo 2 & 3)

glimpse

2009-03-18T13:19:00.000-07:00

moss and stone
rooftops and birds
nude beauty

this

2009-03-17T19:46:00.000-07:00

another iphone offering
the world would be a safer place
if i stopped shooting out my windshield
while driving manual in traffic

let that be enough...

2009-03-15T19:43:00.000-07:00

Thankful for

sun and blue skies
after
grey clouds and dashing wet

brother at wheel
after
lonely drives

late night flick with friend
after
going to bed early in prep for early mornings

exhaustion from dancing
after
exhaustion from mental clenching

clean clothes
after
loads of laundry

Jeremiah
after
Isaiah

butter partial moon
after
full moon unseen behind a bank of storm

"I know, I understand"
after
just me?

bread and wine
after
inability of seeing God's blessing

If you can't remember a better time
you can have mine, little one.
In days to come when your heart feels undone
may you always find an open hand
and take comfort wherever you can.
Deb Talan

emulsion

2009-03-10T20:19:00.000-07:00

read somewhere:
iphone is the new polaroid

i concur
if hesitantly

even now...

2009-03-09T15:53:00.000-07:00

the trees are blushing and blanching
in blossoms both subtle and rash

i never remember it like this

it's a startling newness
just like these emotions and understandings

not sure where they originated
what they herald
whom they belong to
how swift their exit

yet there is beauty
now

even now

oh dear

2009-03-07T07:59:00.000-08:00

please pray calm upon me

(last wedding)

elephant and chords

2009-03-04T11:14:00.000-08:00

found this print in a little store in Scotland
heard this song on a long bus ride to Oxford

this is comfort

2009-02-27T05:23:00.000-08:00

sky and roofness

jet lag words

2009-02-26T03:45:00.000-08:00

it's noon in London
i want real tea

and
i am loved
so vastly yet so truly

on a sidenote:
i'm apt to steal the next infant i see
we will live in a home of brick and shuttered windows
and when you grow i'll teach you to whistle through grass
all our books with hardcovers
the kitchen floor will be yellow tile
our beds obese with pillows

darn you blogging baby photographers!
*shakes fist*

love that boy

2009-02-05T17:39:00.000-08:00

songling

day of lasts

2009-02-05T04:33:00.000-08:00

last nannyday

we are going to do some firsts
...like...
donuts

*laugh*

hum

2009-02-03T16:39:00.000-08:00

spoken to

2009-01-27T19:44:00.000-08:00

when there is no one close, Madeleine becomes my author of choice.
she writes out my jumbled thoughts.
the delusion of being known is welcome tonight
this is a reread... following words had been previously underlined.
must have found them pertinent.
now again there is truth found.

The burning bush. The bush burned, was alive with flame and was not consumed. It is. It is a pure example of ontology. Ontology: the word about the essence of things; the word about being.

I suppose the perfect isness of anything would be frightening without the hope of God.
An oak tree is, and it doesn't matter to it - at least Sartre thinks it doesn't; it is not a thinking oak. Man is; it matters to him; this is terrifying unless it matters to God, too, because this is the only possible reason we can matter to ourselves; not because we are sufficient unto ourselves - I am not; my husband, my family, my friends give me my meaning and, in a sense, my being, so that I know that I, like the burning bush, or the oak tree, am ontological: essential: real.

Madeleine L'Engle . A Circle of Quiet

gold

2009-01-26T17:18:00.000-08:00

still running on sabbath fumes
reminded why we proclaim,
"thanks be to God"

i have a myriad of reasons to love my Papa
today's particular one is Ron Sexsmith

:memories:
driving out to midnight press checks to the sound of Blue Boy
standing against a brick wall at an empty live show
Papa singing 'Beautiful View' through the phone

If I had all this time on my hands
Well I would love to share it with you
And though our days have made other plans
There is nothing I'd rather do
Than sit and talk with you
My beautiful view

(okay... i know... but it works)

gold in them hills
(forgive visual content)

I always dread...

2009-01-23T20:37:00.000-08:00

...the last page of a loved book
never sure what to do with all the bits that endeared it
being spoken to so intimately with no way to respond
i undergo a sense of displacement

(photo from last full moon . my ego apologizes)

Lila could never really be drawn into these conversations,
though Ames tried to include her.
She seemed more interested by the fact that people
talked about such things
than she was by anything they talked about,
and she watched the currents of emotion pass among them,
watchful when they were intent
and
amused when they laughed.

Ditto

2009-01-22T07:33:00.001-08:00

Cole is sitting at the breakfast table.
Hair in disarray, pjs, Lucky Charms:

"I've gotta get ready and see what's going on with myself."

You and me both.

words from the morning

2009-01-20T11:15:00.000-08:00

Her father told his children to pray for patience,
for courage, for kindness, for clarity, for trust, for gratitude.
Those prayers will be answered, he said. Others may not be.
The Lord knows your needs.
So she prayed, Lord, give me patience.
She knew that was not an honest prayer, and she did not linger over it.
Marilynne Robinson

But...
Beloved, we are confident of better things concerning you,
yes, things that accompany salvation.
For God is not unjust to forget your work and labor of love
which you have shown toward His name.
And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence
to the full assurance of hope until the end.
That you do not become sluggish,
but imitate those who through faith and patience
inherit the promises...
this hope we have as an anchor of the soul,
both sure and steadfast.
Hebrews 6

current repeat

2009-01-16T20:46:00.000-08:00

Paths are there
for us to follow
This is gospel I believe
Angels are around us flying
Truth and mercy to recieve

Pictures of uncommon nature
Painted by a masters hand
Draw me ever
On life's journey
Rendered thus to understand

As a songbird
That is fallen
Only to regain the sky
From this frozen shadow
Vally lay my weary head

Love is from
No distance calling
Faithful as the rising sun
Warms the bitter heart
And heartache
Till the east of Eden's gone

Clouds of fear
And misconception
Wax and wane as if the moon
So is in a sense forsaken
Till the will of God be known

(listen)

we do ill in black and white

2009-01-09T07:54:00.000-08:00

Pandora station: Basia Bulat
Anthropologie magazines
peppermint tea

just blue

2009-01-07T12:37:00.000-08:00

and the Weepies say it so well

2008 . december

2009-01-06T09:55:00.000-08:00

December
(in which i shot no personal work)

2008 . november

2009-01-06T09:52:00.000-08:00

November

2008 . october

2009-01-06T09:49:00.000-08:00

October

2008 . september

2009-01-06T09:45:00.000-08:00

September

2008 . august

2009-01-06T09:42:00.000-08:00

August

2008 . july

2009-01-06T09:38:00.000-08:00

July

(this is the only day I wasn't steeped in work... hence the three photos)

2008 . june

2009-01-06T09:28:00.001-08:00

June

being with joy

new name... new blog

magic...

2011

brink of giving all i am

monday is better with babies

thoughts on a home day

a few engagement portraits

of leaves and kings

"I've got you, babe, to wear my ring"

gold

green

april

simple

summer is peeking around the corner...

adventuring minds...

after nap

with the bluntness morning affords...

introducing MissA

2010 is for fulfilling

Peace Out 2009

*moment*

*exhale*

*kisses*

this november night

Favourite iPolaroids of October

pink messy girl

OCTOBER

little joys

wondersome

My Life According to The Innocence Mission

and then it was...

yes

facts:

arrow -->

because it's sat and i'm home

♥

full moon . july

july...

.

as i work...

on being

The White Darkness

"there's a sweet bird calling..."

golden

last weekend

just now...

it's a girl...

Hullo Day....

...

unavoidable...

hilarity

boisterous

*drip*

see and hear

*shrugs*

Look For Me As You Go By

"plane in the sunset..."

"you know sister..."

iphone polaroids

*blink*

momentary things of happiness

darling, come what may...

circular staircase...

this weekend....

"it would be a lie to run away"

"if you're patient i will surprise..."

just words

considering moments...

there was a whale of cloud

where my brain resides this hour

i want to live till fall

she's shiny

it continues...

just

London fika

glimpse

this

let that be enough...

emulsion

moment

exhale

kisses

drip

shrugs

blink

hum